Monday, February 18, 2008

Are You Insured?

Just a silly blog today…

You hear about celebrities insuring body parts all the time. Mostly, I roll my eyes and move on but the other day I heard Tom Jones has insured his chest hair for 7 million dollars. Yes, that’s a seven not a greater than sign… This prompted me to go on a hunt for other insured body parts—look it’s snowing a lot around here and there’s not much to do besides sex, writing and internet research. Sometimes you just have to take a break. So I present to you, the celebrity insurance rundown.

Legs, I have found, are the most popular item to insure. Fred Astaire, Betty Grable and Angie Dickenson all ensured their stems. More recently, you have Heidi Klum, Jamie Lee Curtis, Mariah Carey, Rihanna, Tina Turner, and Michael Flatley. Then there’s David Beckham. Those legs are worth 70 million ladies and gentlemen. Holy duke! 70 million!

Moving on, I got to Betty Davis. She insured herself against weight gain. Can you do that? I want to. I could use a little guaranteed income.

Heading forward (pun completely intended) we get to the people who’ve insured in the neck up area. Jimmy Durante once insured his nose. Kerry Wallace had her hair insured. She wanted compensation if it didn’t grow back after shaving her head for a Star Trek movie. I can get on board with that. Egon Ronay (world famous food critique) insured his tongue. Olivia De Havilland insured her jaw. This was timely and came just before a rather famous punch to said body part. Most recently, America Ferrerra insured her smile. Composer Richard Stockler insured his ears. Julia Roberts’ lips are worth a pretty penny. And Tom Selleck insured his whole face.

Moving downward, Bruce Springsteen, Bob Dylan and Rod Stewart have all insured their voices. I was actually quite surprised not to find more singers on this list. As musicians go, Liberace and Keith Richards insured their hands.

More personally, Dolly Parton’s breasts are insured and British Stripper, Frankie Jakeman, has insured his penis. Is it really that good? Wow.

My research noted that very few athletes actually insure their body parts. This surprised me because of the nature of their work. Besides Beckham, I did find Mark McGuire had a body part insured for a short period of time—but not one that would first come to mind. It was his ankle.

Interesting. So, thinking about celebrities today, who would you insure and for what? Johnny Depp’s cheekbones? Hugh Jackman’s…everything? Sean Connery’s voice? Do you have a part of yourself you'd insure? Tell me…

Another thing one can do when it’s all snowy and cold is huddle under the blankets and read. I devoured four L. Rosario books since my last blog, finishing Captive Fantasies and reading three more. I’ve also read Curses by Cindy Spencer Pape. I would recommend all. I also read a snippet of an up-coming book that was ingenious. You know who you are. Finish it so I can read the whole thing.
For my own writing, I’m chugging away at my book. I completed my character sheets and wrote about 3000 words this weekend. Pretty good considering everything else. Oh and I did my taxes. Yay! And there was much rejoicing. I don’t have to pay. Thank goodness.



Jennifer Armintrout said...

I'm not surprised at some of those... like Becks insuring his legs. He really can't do his job without them. However, the singers really confuse me. Why not insure their vocal cords instead of their legs?

Jennifer Armintrout said...

Oh, and I'm gonna insure my fingers. Because if they got chopped off in a machine or something, I couldn't type and I would lose my income.

Kelly Kirch said...

How bout modesty insurance? All those people have to be incredibly vain about their parts. Sheesh.

L. Rosario said...

hahaha - thanks so much for the mention, Brynn!

Anny Cook said...

Just came back from the taxes. Yay! We don't have to pay! Would like that insurance against weight gain... I wonder how that works.

Excellent 3000 words. So I suppose maybe I should write something today.

Molly Daniels said...

Hahaha...I was also going to say I'd insure my fingers...or my entire arms, since carpel symptoms began.

Ashley Ladd said...

Damn, you're good girl.

Yeah, there is one body part I'd insure if I could. My fingers. I type 100+ wpm. I have to type/write for both my jobs. I also take a lot of short hand.

If my fingers ever go, I'm sunk. I see I'm not the only person here wanting to insure fingers. They're my source of income.

sterlingwriter said...

Alan Rickman's voice.
(Now you'll get more hits on your blog.)
As for myself - my amazing brain. Not my recent baking skills, as my scones look like the blueberry blobs that took over the universe.