Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Stuck in the Middle Ages

First up, I’m doing this blog from the perspective of a 21st century girl. I’m pretty sure a medieval girl took things as they were…I’m sure the justice system in the middle ages was just a “that’s how it is” thing, just as overpriced gas is a “that’s just as it is” thing now. You accept things as they are because that’s your point of reference. So…as a 21st century girl, here are a just few things I really don’t think I’d tolerate well:

Cold—I don’t take it well now. I don’t think I’d survive if it was the pervasive circumstance of six months of the year. Lots of people died during medieval winters. I would because my fragile system would rebel and give me an ultimatum. Warm up now or I die. I wouldn’t last…

The unwashed masses—this really doesn’t need explanation. A bath once a year doesn’t cut it. Yes, bathing was expensive back then. Let me tell you, characters in my books are terrible money wasters. They bathe often. Yes, I tell a velour version of history.

General lack of cleanliness—dogs as napkins? No thank you. Dropping scraps to the floor? No thank you. That bathing thing…no no no.

Illiteracy—I’m a writer…reading is a must. It keeps society from being over-taken by misogynistic jerks who manipulate the uninformed. It also keeps me in chocolate.

Pox/plague—No thank you. Although…we have our own new versions of the plague/pox. I may need to think on this one a bit. I just know I don’t want to deal with anything like the black plague. Ever.

The Hun Next Door—Living in fear of invasion, attack and pillage isn’t my cup of tea. Give me a good domestic defence system any day of the week. Even the infrequent, handsome knight in tarnished armour wouldn’t do it for me. I would certainly have signed up to boil the oil for castle protection…

No internet or phones!!!—I would not survive in these dark days. I need mass communication. I thought I would die last summer when I was without my cell phone and the internet for a week. I don’t think I’d make it too long in the middle ages. Town Crier? That just won’t do it.

Rats—C’mon! See uncleanliness and plague. Besides. I scream if I see a mouse. Lots of big rodents would send me into an irreversible state of insanity. Burn me at the stake please.

As I’m doing research for one of my new books, I’ve come up with quite a few things like this.

These are really just the tip of the flea-ridden masses. Does it stop me from writing about that period of time? No. Because there are plenty of things I really like about the middle ages—but that’s another write up.

In other news…I’m finally starting to feel a little better. A little. It’s been three years since I’ve had bad sinus issues so I guess I shouldn’t complain much, but geez!! Enough already.

My newest book, Tribute for the Goddess comes out next Monday! I’m so excited I could just happy dance from now until then. It’s really one of my favourite books and it’s getting high marks.


When Jett, Goddess of the Zodiac Quadrant, flees her home and the rogue god hunting her, she knows has one place to hide—Earth. She calls on her pledged servant, Thad, for protection. Thad, however, isn’t willing to jump to her aid. He’s served Jett for two hundred years in a position he feels she tricked him into accepting. Now, he has conditions…

"Accept me as your god. You’re mine and you will obey me."

It’s everything Jett’s wanted and completely forbidden. No mortal may touch a goddess without consequences. No goddess may indulge in her lust for her pledged servant without divine punishment. As her flight forces her into his arms, they break these laws of god and mortal to find a love that will never be allowed. Together, they fight her enemy, but in the end, their greatest enemy might be themselves.

Happy reading, warmth and a pox-free day to all of you! ~~Brynn


Kelly Kirch said...

Along with the afore mentioned, yellow snarly teeth. I did a nasty take in my Marriage Mart book. I think I'll post it tomorrow... just for you!

Bronwyn's Blog said...

Good for your characters, wasting money and getting all clean. I like me some velour in my historicals! I think I might die if forced to deal with the lack of a daily hot shower...ewww and greasy hair.

BTW, I'm beyond excited that Tribute is coming out next week. I LOVE that story so, so, SO much. Yay You!!!!

Anonymous said...

Ewww yes Kelly, gnarly rotten teeth. They can have that! Can you imagine the stench? LOL! yes, give me harlequin's version of the middle ages please ;)


Amarinda Jones said...

The Middle Ages? How pukeable. No thank you.

Jennifer Armintrout said...

Well, they didn't bathe that often, but they did wash up. However, the water was cold, and you'd just die faster.

Anny Cook said...

When I was a kid (yes I was once upon a time) it was quite common to take two baths a week--Wednesday night and Saturday night. Hair was washed on Saturday. In between it was brushed 100 strokes every night. No one thought much about it, that was just the way it was.

Molly Daniels said...

I don't think I'd survive that era...unless I could be wrapped in many layers and be allowed to huddle by the fire all day:) And of course, have plenty of HOT water!

Caley Greene said...

I'll take a cup of velour with my history.